say you'll be mine

Today is the 2nd anniversary of Katrina. I get so mad at myself sometimes because I take so much for granted and I complain about so many things that don't really matter at all. Like the fact that I'm broke. So what? There are people who are still homeless, two years after the fact, and I'm complaining that I can't afford books this semester. I should be thankful that I can go to school and get an education but instead I just find things to dislike about it. Maybe that's what's wrong with this country as a whole, we take way too many things for granted. We're so self-centered and vain that we lose sight of the real issues. I know I sound like a liberal here (have no fear - that's not happening anytime soon) but I just think that if people took a little time to help other people, the world might be a better place.

John and I went to the beach yesterday and both of us got sunburned. He found a starfish in the water and a huge crab that was still alive, which sent me straight out of the water. I really dont know how I got so lucky. He makes it so easy for me to talk to him, which is huge because I am not the type of person to talk about things when I'm upset. He makes me laugh all the time and he gets along with my family which is really important to me. And we can both have our own lives, which is something that I really need right now. With Steven, we alllllways had to be together and alllllways had to be doing the same things, which is why it didnt work with him. I have to be able to have my alone time and time to do things on my own. And same with him, he's pefectly fine if we go and do our own thing. That's what makes this feel so real I think. I used to have this whole list of things I wanted in someone, and he's totally the opposite of all of that. Maybe the fact that he's not perfect is what makes him so perfect. But the fact that I am so so so so insanely, ridiculously happy with him scares me because it makes me that much more afraid of rejection.

I promised Erin I'd take her to IHOP the last day of summer, so after we hit the gym we're going to drive up there for a late lunch. I can't believe Andrew is a senior this year, or that Erin is a freaking sophomore. It makes me sad that we're all growing up and that in a year Andrew will be out of here. I think I just have to stop thinking about these things.