holiday recap

Thanksgiving was nice. I woke up to watch the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade, ate chocolate chip birthday pancakes that my mom made, and took my time getting dressed since Thanksgiving is supposed to be a lazy holiday. I opened some gifts with my family (necklace and Swedish alcohol) while my mom took 45345 pictures of us. We (my family + John) went to my cousin Tommy's house for a little bit to visit with my family, where John and I played foosball and pool, and where he beat me at both. It was quieter than most holidays with my family, and we only stayed for a couple hours. Then we went to John's sister's for dinner, and we had fun playing with the kids, even if Ryan was a ball of endless energy all day long. We had yummy turkey and stuffing and mashed potatoes, and his sister's homemade apple pie. I opened some birthday gifts (a fabulous "I <3 Lifehouse" hoodie from John, Enchanted from Jen and the kids, and Wall-E from John's parents) and by that time it was almost 8pm so we left. That night we watched Wall-E but I barely stayed awake for it all.

Friday, I went to work with John. It was actually a lot of fun. He let me wear his FedEx jacket and even made me deliver some packages by myself to residential areas. We delivered 186 packages and made (I think) about 45 stops. I only got in the way once, which was good since his truck is kind of cramped. We went to a big building full of different offices in Meriden where there were two really sketchy old elevators, where you had to open the wooden doors & gates, and crank the elevator to where you wanted it to go and match up lines on the walls before getting out...it was quite terrifying to me, but I survived. We got done around 3pm, since a lot of his stops were closed for the holiday. That night we went out to Dakota's with two of his friends, had really slowwww service, expensive and not-worth-it food, but good drinks. It took an hour to get our food, twenty minutes just to get our drinks! We were all so annoyed that we ate and left as quickly as possible, but it was still fun.

Saturday we came to my house for a birthday dinner and ate really yummy taco salad that my mom made. We decorated the Christmas tree, spent fifteen minutes taking a Christmas card picture, and watched Wall-E with Dad and Aunt Sonia. I opened more gifts (a Wall-E snowglobe from John, liquor from Art & Sonia, Bath & Body Works stuff I've been wanting from Erin, a shotglass from Andrew, and a car payment from my grandparents) and ate birthday cake.

That night, we went to the Casino with my grandparents. It was an hour drive- we left at 9:30pm and got there around 10:30. John and I went to the bar and he ordered me a Sex on the Beach which was really yummy. We gambled a little, I was ahead at one point but ended up losing all my money (which was only 40 dollars). John did well and went home only losing $10. We were out til about 2:30 and didn't get back to his house until 4am, so needless to say we slept really late today. (Til 3pm). We went to Denny's for a late (really late) breakfast, and to Walmart to get some stuff. We watched some corny Lifetime Christmas movies and were lazy, since it was disgusting outside (rainy, cold, and wet all day long).

Definitely a good weekend and I am sad to have to go back to work and school.

on being thankful

I have a lot of things to be thankful for. My family, my amazing boyfriend, my health, my education, my happiness, my home, my car...and the list goes on. I like Thanksgiving, not because the Pilgrims made friends with the Indians (turns out they killed them and pushed them off their land, how nice), but because it's the one day where we stop and are thankful for what we do have. I am blessed with a close family that loves me, a man who treats me like gold, and way better health than in past years. It's so easy to get caught up in the day-to-day and forget about what we have, not necessarily in worldly or material possessions, but what we have in love, friendship, and happiness.

Tomorrow I am going to Thanksgiving dinner with John and his family. It will be strange to not be with my family, but I am going to stop and see my family in the afternoon, since we aren't eating at Jen's until 5pm. It will also be weird because it's my birthday and it wont feel like it, but that's ok, because we are celebrating this weekend with my family, and that will be fun. Again, more to be thankful for.

I hope all everyone enjoys their day tomorrow, and if you don't celebrate Thanksgiving, have a great day anyway!

the one where i post a lot of pictures

I skipped school today to work on my Swedish immigration paper. It was worth it; I got almost all of it done. It was so cool to read my grandfather's history, and about how my family came to be. I have three years worth of letters from my great-grandfather and great-grandmother during their "courtship" that are so interesting to read them, and I feel really privileged to have those.  It's amazing back then how intact families were, and how they helped each other out no matter what. My great-grandfather lived to be 99 and a half, and no doubt it was because of our amazing family. I don't remember him that much, I was only a year or so when he died, but my mom always tells me how he remembered my name even after he forgot everyone else's - I think it's because I'm named after his mother Emilie, but it makes me feel special anyway. He was such a handsome man, even up into his old age.

Handsome, right?! Not only that, he was a good man...and I'd give anything to be able to talk to him and know him now that I am older. I hope he would be proud that I am writing a paper about him.

While I spent 10 hours working on the project today, I also found time to procrastinate. What better way to procrastinate than take self portraits? I had good intentions (purposeful intentions, even). I was trying to decide what to wear on Thanksgiving, aka my birthday.I don't think I like my hair with side-bangs. But I usually hate my hair when it's up. I just plain old don't like my hair lately.

Hair up with bangs, hair down with bangs, hair off the face with headband?

I tried to get a picture of the bangs, and it came out kinda cool. My skin has been so red and blotchy lately; I hate this cold weather. I need a good non-pimple-creating moisturizer...as if I had the money to buy one.

Lucy was looking so cute this afternoon, I couldn't help myself.

Tomorrow is my last day of work before a glorious 4 day weekend - full of yummy food, turning 21, getting a Christmas tree, seeing my family, and taco salad. I might even go to church with my mom tomorrow night because I know it would make her happy, even though I detest going to church.

this and that

You know what is really frustrating? When my favorite show leaves a HUGE cliffhanger, and then says it wont be back until January 5. When I will be 1,000 miles away from home and unable to watch. Drives me insane.

My birthday is in three (almost two) days, I'm very excited. I love birthdays, even when they are not mine. I like that every single person gets a day that's all about them. It's one thing you can't take away, no matter what. Birthdays are always there.

I'm sore from the gym, I'm cold from the lack of heat, and I'm tired just because I'm tired.I got my Ipod tangled on a machine at the gym, luckily the only people around me were people I know so it wasn't as embarrassing as it could have been. I have the day off tomorrow, but I have to buckle down and start working on a paper and presentation that are due in December. I really want to try and get to the store to buy my Christmas cards, so I can write them out on Friday.

Oh, and because I am turning a magical 21, my car insurance company decided to lower my policy amount, so now I am saving an extra $400 a year! Thanks cavemen! Oh! And John said I could go to work with him Friday and help him...so watch out, all of you businesses on the Berlin turnpike and Research parkway, you're getting a new FedEx girl on Friday ;)

milo being adorable

Currently Stressing Over: Graduate school...where to go, how long it will last, how much it will cost.

My school does not offer a dual Masters & Certification program, which is what I want. Southern does offer one, so I emailed a few people to find out about it. I think I'll have to start applying fairly soon.

I will graduate with a BA in December 2009, and then depending on which program, it could be up to two years until I graduate with my MA and Certification, which means I may not be teaching until 2012. That seems way too far away. Ahhh information overload!

I took a lot of pictures of Milo this weekend because he was looking especially adorable. (When does he not??) I'll post a few on here.

Excited for this week - Tuesday I'm off from everything, Thursday is Thanksgiving AKA my birthday, and Friday we are getting our Christmas tree! It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas.... =)


Here we are on top of the shelf in John's closet. Still recovering from having his manhood taken away =)



Helloooo I'm really cute!

something about the way i love you

No school until Dec 2!

I'm house sitting at my uncle's this weekend. He and my grandparents are going to VT this weekend for a funeral, and they have to labradors that need attention, so John and I will be staying out there with them. It will be nice to get away and relax, but I feel bad that it's because of a funeral (of an 18 year old who committed suicide, no less).

Milo had his surgery yesterday which had me worried all day long. I went to check on him last night after class and my poor boy was so drugged up and sleepy! I felt so bad for him, but I went back over today and he was much better but still sleepy. I texted John this afternoon that I got out of class early and he texted back that I should go see Milo, which was cute, because he usually is too tired during the week to do anything with me. He said he doesn't know what to do with himself, being off all week. I guess he is bored ;)

Looking forward to the holidays too...I'm setting next Friday aside to do all my Christmas cards - so keep an eye out in the mail over the next few weeks!

Ricky is sitting on my desk next to the keyboard giving me an evil stare...I guess maybe he wants me to feed him? =)

Here is Milo a few weeks ago...John was cleaning out his closet to find things to donate to Goodwill, and Milo had to get in the dresser and check things out for himself:

a little splurge

Since my birthday is next week, and I have not bought myself much in the last year (besides Pepper, of course), I decided to splurge at my favorite store, New York and Company. Technically, I did not splurge - I used my credit card...and the fact that it was Tuesday (on Tuesdays gold card holders get an extra discount) I justified the $150 on clothes. I got a really nice little black dress for only $60 - obviously, a black dress is a staple (like potatoes or rice) as far as clothing goes. I got a pair of black pants for work, since my favorite pair that I've had since I was a sophomore in high school finally broke apart. I got a nice top for Thanksgiving (aka my birthday) and another top with a shell for work. Not a bad deal for all that stuff.

I have done no school work in the last two days. It's too close to Thanksgiving break...although I really do need to work on my two papers. Thursday night, that's the plan. Don't let me forget!

all that shimmers

Despite the rainy, damp, and cold weather, this weekend was pretty good. I spent all of Friday night cleaning out my closet, putting away summer clothes, and getting rid of stuff I don't wear anymore. My room is so clean, I love it.

Saturday we (my parents, Erin, John and I) braved the crowded mall and trekked through crowds of people to the Disney Store to buy our park tickets. I think I was the only one excited about getting them, but what are you gonna do? ;)Forty-six days until we leave!After that, John and I met Matt for lunch at Chili's, went back to his house, and we both fell asleep for a fabulous two hour nap. Then we went back to Chili's with Matt and we each got our own lava cake dessert - and do you know those things have 1300 calories in them?? Luckily I wasn't able to finish mine. Sunday was lazy, we slept in til after noon. John and I were just driving around that afternoon and we just happened to end up at this cute little gift store that he delivers to for work. He told me months ago that it is a store that I would like, and recently told me that it's going out of business. I've been dying to go, but I didn't know how to get there, or the address, or the name, or anything. My super-awesome boyfriend brought me there Sunday afternoon and we spent 45 minutes walking through the store (and I spent 45 minutes wishing I wasn't broke!) They had the cutest things, it reminded me of an Anthropologie store, minus clothing. I hope I get my sister for Secret Santa, so I have another excuse to go there before they close.

John and I started going to the gym last week, and it feels SO GOOD to be back. I forgot how much it de-stresses me, not to mention that I actually feel good about myself after. And it was a nice surprise to see that I didn't lose much of my endurance in the last 11 months that I have been without a membership.

Wall-E was released today and SOMEONE is very excited and hopeful that it will show up on November 27th as a birthday gift (hint hint) since I am obviously broke saving for Christmas and Disney. (Have I mentioned that I am broke?) Also on my list of Disney DVDs that I have not been able to afford in the last year: Sleeping Beauty, Enchanted, Robin Hood, Fox and the Hound, Mulan, etc. For anyone who doesn't know, I collect the animated classics and some of the newer movies, but they MUST be in the cardboard sleeve, otherwise I wont buy them. It's a collection, which is why they all have to match, duh. I am very excitd that Beauty and the Beast is re-releasing in 2010, and I'm pretty sure Snow White is in 2009. =)

It's cold, I have school tomorrow, and I am dying for Thanksgiving break. Next week I have two days of work and that's it. I'm skipping school on Tuesday, Thursday is my birthday (which is obviously why everyone has the day off, nevermind that it's Thanksgiving!), and Friday I have off work. And then the semester is pretty much over...hello Christmas break! Hello Disney!

Life is good. =)

is it only me?

Do you know what is really annoying? What I do not understand at all?

Why girls feel the need to talk on their cell phone while they are in a public bathroom. HONESTLY.

Public bathrooms are bad enough to begin with. Especially when you are not the only one in the bathroom. To me, it's awkward to have a communal place do to something that most people consider pretty personal. But to talk on your phone while either in a public bathroom or even worse, going to the bathroom, is just the weirdest and most annoying thing I can think of. And you know what? It's always the girls that wears supertight leggings, uggs, and those jackets with the fake fur on the hood, with too much makeup and a super obvious fake tan. The type of girl who can't be off her phone for more than a minute without having a panic attack.

So, I purposely try to run the water longer, or make a lot of noise when I get papertowels, or flush the toilet two or three extra times...because whenever someone makes noise and they can't hear the person on the other end of the line, they're all "What?? I can't hear you!" Well MAYBE if you didn't talk on your phone while you are in the bathroom you wouldnt have that problem!

Personally, I can't even stand to pee when someone is close enough to hear and I even turn the sink on half the time when I'm at John's. Half the time I can't pee unless water is running, I'm that weirded out by it. So you can understand my frustration when these strangers are having in-depth conversations about who hooked up with who last night or who wore the wrong color shoes with those pants WHILE I'M TRYING TO PEE.

Reason # 34875 why I HATE GIRLS.

lucky

Last night, not even an hour after I wrote about how the gym thing didn't work out, guess what happened?

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That's right, John was on my porch holding two gym passes, one for my sister and one for me. He went to the gym and convinced the owner to not only let us join without paying the $100 down payment, but for a cheaper price than the original advertisement. My sister and I are now on a plan for $15.90 a month - for both of us.  Not only that, but we got gold passes, which means half off drinks and stuff, and so many tanning sessions. What really made me melt, was that he said he did it because he doesn't want me to worry about calories and starving myself (yeah, I was heading down that road for a little bit, but all is well now). He said that if he couldn't get the gym to give us the deal, he still would have paid all that extra money, just so I could work out and not worry about what I eat so much. That I love that boy to pieces, I really do. I am so lucky to have someone like him in my life.

The three of us went tonight and it was SO good to finally work out again.

Also, today is Veteran's Day, and if you haven't done it yet, thank the veteran's you know. (hint, hint: - John is a veteran!) So thank you babe, for giving up two and a half years of your life to serve this country, plus countless drill weekends, trainings, and everything else you've done. I love you!

ARGH.

Last week, I got a flier in the mail from the gym I used to go to, saying that they were offering memberships for $10 a month. I told my sister, because we've been wanting to join a gym again - only we are broke and can't afford it. This got us really excited, because anyone can afford $10 a month.

Tonight we drove over to sign up and found out that in order to get that deal, we have to put down $100 before we can actually sign up. She obviously does not have that money just lying around...and I barely have that much money left over each month after I pay all my bills. Now that Christmas is so soon, and our vacation is literally right after Christmas, I have no extra money.

So we are mad. Really mad. I'm probably going to have to wait until February or March to sign up, cause I just wont have that extra money until then.
Argh. =(

how long do we have to wait

I hate these days. I feel so blah all day, come home, and do nothing.

Every night this week I've gone to bed telling myself that tomorrow will be better, that I'll get more accomplished and feel good about the day. And everyday I have barely had the energy to get out of bed, let alone make myself feel useful during the day.

I feel so alone in this house. It's like coming home to an empty house. My mom only asks me about my day to see if there's anyone she can gossip about in town, and when I try to tell her how my day really was, she does that half-listening thing and says "ok" every few minutes because she thinks it will make her seem interested. My sister is so self-absorbed and trying to talk to her is pointless because she get gets irritated...unless, of course, she wants something, and then it's a totally different story.

The house is disgusting, there is so much clutter everywhere. My parents have stacks of thier clothes sitting on our family room floor waiting to be ironed, and they leave their dishes in the sink for days. My parent's mail accumulates on the kitchen table for weeks at a time until there is no more room for mail. My sister is so self-absorbed that she doesn't notice any of this, let alone the messes she makes and leaves behind. The upstairs bathroom is disgusting and everyone leaves wet towels just laying on the floor. I seriously wish I didn't have to live here. I try to keep my areas clean and I do, but it makes no difference when the rest of the house is a mess. I clean up after myself but you would never know it.

I know I sound selfish and unappreciative. My parents let me live here rent-free, and thank god, because I can barely afford to get by right now while I'm in school. It is just SO frustrating, coming home to this everyday. I can't even go to sleep when I want to because my mom is so loud and runs around upstairs, slamming doors and talking on the phone. My house is small, and cramped, and old, and is never quiet. I never get to bed before midnight even when I try.

Some days I just want someone to talk to, about anything. Talking to John isn't easy because we're apart during the week and I really don't feel like talking online is really talking.

I feel like I'm stuck in this rut of school and work, and I'm not actually getting anywhere. I'll graduate, but I still wont be able to get a job until I finish grad school. I feel like my life is going to be static until then...I wont get anywhere financially, I wont be able to start a career...it's like I'm just stuck indefinitely. Is it even worth it?

I just really hate feeling so helpless.

blahh

I am having a really off week and I can't figure out why.

Things are bothering me that don't normally bother me. I have zero motivation.

I want to fast forward my life to when I don't have to live here anymore.

VOTE

I get really angry when people don't vote. Or don't take a stand on issues.

This is the most historic election ever, and in the midst of the worst economic crisis since the Great Depression...and STILL, people are apathetic.

I wont' tell you who to vote for, since I don't particularly like either one. Just vote!

november 2

I do not like Sunday nights.

Army Wives season finale was tonight. That show, as much as I love it, makes me so happy that John is out for good on February 23rd. And, the season finale didn't leave much of a cliffhanger...not like last year, anyway. I hope the third season starts sooner than it usually does...waiting until June will be way too painful ;)

Halloween was disappointing this year, I didn't see any good costumes. Kids don't even want to stay in theirs anymore...when I was ten I never wanted to take mine off! Where has the Halloween spirit gone??

I hope everyone remembers to vote on Tuesday. And anyone who hasn't seen this week's SNL with John McCain should definitely go YouTube it. Right now.

My birthday is in twenty five days, almost twenty four. =)